Thursday, September 19, 2013
Most of the followers of this blog would know by now the intensity of my direct, blunt, straight to the point write ups. I also like to remind people that I am not one of those who point the faults and do not suggest a probable solution to challenges. Believe me when I say I experience almost everything I put on this blog. It is my way of reaching to your hearts with mine.
As much as I am a woman, I like to keep the balance between the genders, pointing out moderately and admonishing correctly.
Faith, a beautiful woman who has everything going on for her; career, service in the church and community, wonderful team player both at home and at work. She's a virgin, but when she meets Kola who promises marriage, she gives it away to him anyway. What's the big deal? One fateful day, Faith visits Kola's office only to find him right on it with another woman. Faith is heart broken, she wonders where she had been wrong, if she had not been serving Mr. Kola right. She puts all of this blame on herself. She tries to look even sexier but refuses to let go of Kola. Kola of course pleads for forgiveness but his acts remains the same. Meanwhile Faith's guilt is eating her so deeply she can't function as much anymore. She begins to lose focus and starts tons of prayers for Kola while he's busy drifting into his wayward lifestyle.
Take a pause; how many Faiths and Kolas do I know pretending with surfaced smiles everyday? In my mind I'm thinking; is Faith ok? You're praying for him, how about you, who committed the act with him, how about the fact that you're still giving your body to him without doing the right thing by getting married?
Let me first address the women. Many females have become objects of pleasure to men who are weak in self control. You sit there blaming yourself for someone else's responsibility. We allow ourselves be lured into the lowest of standards forgetting that we will have to bear the burden eventually. If only Faith knew that Kola had no self control, she would have understood not to give herself away so easily. I'm in a world where there are limited virgins, hence will skip right to my point. So, what if you're not a virgin anymore, must you become his booty call? Do you have to satisfy him because you don't want to lose him? The worst part is you becoming the new topic of discussion among his colleagues. Many kissing and telling things going on. The chances of keeping it together in marriage is very slim. It's the reason so many married men cannot remain married. Being chaste is a challenge in our world. Women walk with their heads bowed to the ground, their dignity marred, their worth reduced. Some women do not believe that a man can love them without sex, because their minds have been trained to believe so. If you have dated ten men and not one of them could tell you no premarital sex(as a born again Christian) then something is seriously wrong with the born again issue. It is time for a reality check. You're either saved or you're not.
The men; I applaud you for your strength which some of you choose to use unwisely. You want to eat hot soup that will eventually burn your mouth. All I see is a world of many men with good careers, strong in demeanor but very weak sexually. Some men cannot categorically tell that they will not cheat on their wives. You know the answer within, so let's cut out the pretense. Yes, it's a man's world, but every man will be judged accordingly. You think the only way to prove to a woman that you love her is by sexually violating your body and hers in the name of love? Something is missing, because the last time I checked the same Bible we read, it says that we sin against ourselves when we commit fornication. I am not preaching but telling it as it is. The church is a bunch of unsaved people claiming to be saved. I thought old things pass away indeed. It happened for Paul the persecutor; So come on out and be saved indeed! So many men get into marriage with the wrong mindset, all you ever cared about was her looks. So, by the time she bears two children for you, you're onto a sister in church or at work. You quickly forget to give your wife compliments that you easily would when you both were hotly in love, but you flirt so easily with other good looking women. You walk away selfishly when she needs you the most. Many men choose to have sex but are afraid of the responsibility of fathering a child. How dare you suggest abortion to that woman whom you made love to in your right senses? Then, when your future approaches with consequences you run back to God. Why not fix it now?
If we are born again, let it not be our tongue alone, but our genitals. I have come to realize that God's standard remains the same regardless of Grace. We cut ourselves off so easily by asserting that we're weak when we should take responsibility by training our bodies to become God's temple. For someone like me, when I'm in no relationship whatsoever, I am in my best behavior and sometimes I choose to keep it that way if that will keep me chaste before my Father in Heaven. Many men are so quick to kiss, touch, losing their firmness all in the name of attraction, affection and love. I honestly just call it lust. No matter how much you love a woman, learn to keep your hands in your pocket if you intend to keep a home. Am I being direct, or am I being direct?
Women are weak and in fact sensitive to touch, so why touch her? Women are taken over by sweet words, so why deceive her because you really just need to satisfy your evil urge? Women don't even try to expose your breasts and thighs to him because he is visual. He plays it in his head like a movie. You're giving him free porn simple. Then you wonder why he pounces on you...Come on! We aren't virgins, so why create situations that would make you both end up in your panties? I just laugh at our foolishness and I'm sure God does...
I will clearly state: Proverbs 4:14-16
"Enter not into the path of the wicked, and go not in the way of evil men.
15 Avoid it, do not go on it; turn from it and pass on.
16 For they cannot sleep unless they have caused trouble or vexation; their sleep is taken away unless they have caused someone to fall."
We can't possibly pretend that everyone that comes into our lives has been sent of God. It is our responsibility to avoid those that are out to stain our garments. Those that intend to pull down the Glory of God in our lives. Either you're single or married, these words apply to every true believer of the Gospel of Christ. If we're chaste indeed, we have solved half of our spiritual challenges. Men, stop draining your strength by joining your bodies with women that you're not married to. Think about the spiritual consequences and likewise women, please do not be deceived, if he cannot wait, then tell him goodbye. It is time to take a stand for Jesus. I say this only because it is possible. You can ask me and I will tell you. Let us Rock Christ indeed not with our tongues alone, but sexually and in deed!
So answer me: What should Faith do?
Live, Love, Laugh
Saturday, September 14, 2013
Hello to the beautiful minds that stop by this page every time to read my heart. Some of these things I write, I somewhere within hope and pray that it finds the hearts of even the younger generations for direction in a dark complicated world, where fathers fail to be fathers and have stopped receiving instructions from the correct source to teach their sons. A world where mothers now feel the need to become fathers, teaching their daughters only to be men. A world where there is misplacement of priorities, teaching every young child only to look to their peers for answers on how to navigate this world. Yes, those ones do my heart reach out to. Yes, my heart only prays to see my Manny stand up for the truth of Love in his heart, no matter who was there to train him. That he receives the right instructions to guide his feet into life.
I know every home has a story of it own. Mine is nothing short of every thriving woman's story in my life. These women are strong it hurts. Yes, I am strong it hurts, because I can only look back and realize that I was trained by a culture that pushes me to strength. I was trained by being first place in the family, which only pressured me to want to lay good examples. So, while so many boys sat there watching soccer, thinking it's a man's world, gradually losing the strength of being a son, looking to the girls to do every chore in the home; some of us girls learned how to be first place only. Some of these boys have been failed by fathers, who were probably too busy to give honorable instructions to their boys. Also being failed to see a woman honored, such that they would learn to honor the women in their world. No wonder the book of Proverbs stresses so much on instruction. Instructions guide the feet of a man to wisdom. Knowledge and wisdom in turn guides a man to mature understanding. An understanding that teaches one to walk with another together in friendship, relationship and marriage.
We now have a chaotic world of beings looking for the right relationship to mend their brokenness. The man blames the woman, the woman blames the man. Truth is; the foundation on which many boys and girls were nurtured has its miniature. This is not directed to boost religion or culture. This is just me being an observer in my world right now. This is me suggesting the solutions to minds that are ready to heal for a beautiful future, and if indeed marriages were models, then those before us will teach their young sons to see visions and their young daughters to prophecy.
Little wonder why so many grown men and women (in age) are emotional wrecks, bestowing wrecks on the souls of others that come their way. The newest style is dating, dating and more dating. Imagine how the population of broken hearted beings are doubling in the world of dating. Culture unfortunately doesn't heal the half-baked emotions left for us to take into the institution of marriage, hence, more divorces. How can a woman who had been brutally abused remember how to trust a man? How can a man love a woman who in turn chooses infidelity, how can he learn to ever trust a woman? Yet these two kinds go into these dating relationships which might lead into marriage; seeking to be healed by another who had no idea of the hurt they'd been through.
In fact, let me shock you about how the hurt of a mistreated childhood can throw a supposedly blissful life off tangent. So many of us, need to visit that spot where our sweet childhood turned into a sour fast paced one. Every child reserves the right to grow up well, ready to face the world. So many boys and girls never grew up to become men and women. How then do you expect a boy and a girl to walk together in a marriage institution modeled only for mature (grown up to be men and women) minds. It will not work if a boy marries a woman and if a man marries a girl. One will definitely get hurt. Guess who will? The man not the boy, the woman not the girl. We all know what we would do back in elementary school when we had special friends who would hurt us, and so quickly, we would move on to the next available special friend. I assertively do not speak of age. The boy and girl ‘syndrome’ applies to every age bracket. Boys and girls (not in age) pay no attention to their wounds because realistically daddy and mommy would tend to that wound. My question is; where are our daddies and mommies to perceive and observe that we're wounded constantly? Our wounds must be nurtured to healing. It is even worse where soul ties (sex) take place in these relationships. So many breakups have it seriously bad these days.
If my words find sense in your soul, then you will take time to evaluate your life at this point. Oh! Trust me, much of that I had been doing in the last three months. I thought I was ready, so ready to bliss again, and there came all the dirt from my hurtful childhood that I had to fix, an encroaching abusive past that eats trust out of my heart. No man deserves to live with all that baggage right. If you're the man, the woman you choose does not deserve to live with your hurtful unhealed past. That soul deserves healing, a healing that hurts, but will surely come. It is not too late to take time in or out of that relationship to work out the foundation of your life before another innocent person gets hurt.
I, like so many women dream a beautiful bliss with another man. Bliss will be beat if you refuse to address your young life. Spend time preparing your heart and soul for healing. In these process alone can you grow into a worthy woman (strong in character, to be the crown of any man). So many men are tired of trying to make it work. I can tell you that every man has been created to be the covering of a woman and if you have not learned how to be that covering, all you are is a roaming being seeking for direction, constantly dragging innocent girls with you into your hole of destruction. How then can you possibly lead a woman, or even a family in the right direction? Find your growing mojo now, so that you won't look too hard before finding a deserving woman to walk with you in this world.
There are lucky men and women who have had it good, these does not apply to you. My message is directed to the young broken hearted in my generation. Who at some point had to learn life lessons the hard hurtful way. You are not alone and you have a shot everyday to heal. Visit your hurtful roots and be free. Receive right instructions, be better; choose to grow up now, and we will not have to counsel so much on relationships (lol). Counsel is good definitely. Let me also stress that age is not maturity, neither is it wisdom. Our experiences only teach us not to fall on the same spot, but if we take a good look around, we will see the diversity in our world and half of it our minds cannot master. Divine wisdom comes from one source; it comes from God.
Live, Love, Laugh